Editor's note: This piece inspired by Chris Hoadley's August Writing Challenge, Comic Zone, caught my attention. I think Jeff's onto an interesting idea. What other classic games would you enjoy seeing an update? I'd love to see a modern, co-op version of Dig Dug! -Jason

I was looking through my old Retro Gamer magazines, trying to find an old-school game to serve as inspiration for a comic and article for the Comics Zone Writing Challenge. I came across a lot of pretty popular titles, but none really caught my eye until I stumbled upon Burger Time. It had a picture of the original game art and a few shots of the game itself. I actually owned the Intellivision version of Burger Time way back in “Ye Olde Days of Gaming,” and I loved it.
And I wondered: What would it be like to play a modern take on Burger Time?
For those of you who don't remember Burger Time, it's a 2D platformer. You control a chef named Peter Pepper. For some odd reason, your game platforms are made of metal, buns, hamburgers patties, and lettuce. Deranged, humanoid versions of food chased you around the platforms: a hot dog, a sunny-side-up egg, and a pickle (I couldn't make this up, folks).
The object of the game is to run across the buns and then drop them down to the different levels below to eventually complete the whole hamburger. You receive extra points if you trap the enemies between the falling hamburger ingredients, smashing and killing them. You also have a pepper shaker that you can use to toss pepper in the enemies' faces to temporarily stun them.

As I look at the pictures of the levels, I'm thinking to myself that it would be awesome if this game were remade into a co-op game. In a style similar to Castle Crashers, up to four players could play, either as teammates or as rivals. I could just see myself being chased by a hot dog while another player lets loose a bun that squashes both me and my trailing foe.
As all of these wild ideas ran through my head, I started to think what the backstory of the whole game might actually be. I came up with the idea that Peter Pepper owned a small but respectable eatery downtown. One of his assistant chefs, Steve Salmonella (why would he even hire a guy named that?), left out some chicken on the table overnight. The chicken just happened to have SARS and radiation poisoning — and probably Ebola or something as well. Suddenly, it explodes, and mutated chicken goo gets slathered on all the buns, lettuce, hamburger meat, hot dogs, eggs, and pickles (that Steve also left out for some reason). This causes massive growth and irritability in the once peaceful food items. Chaos ensues from that point.
I'm hoping someone in game development or Hollywood sees this idea and runs with it so I can finally see my dream of a horror-themed, Burger Time Death Match come true. Just the idea of getting called a nooblet at a game I've been playing for over 28 years by some random 12 year old gives me goosebumps.
So for all of you out there laughing at my idea — keep in mind when your playing this game 2 years from now and some random guy totally slams your Peter between two buns, a burger, and some lettuce that it was me who just totally pwned you.