Monkeys are a quarrelsome workforce. Baboons demand way less banana-wages and unionize by butt-skin coloration. Imagine that bullet point in the annual employee conference video.
News Blips:
Developer Crytek UK buys too many monkeys and confirms it isn't developing TimeSplitters 4. CVG reports the team formerly known as Free Radical unsuccessfully adopted the "infinite monkey theorem" when attempting development of a potential fourth entry in the first-person shooter series.
A leaked Rayman Legends trailer showcases physical toys interacting with in-game content on the Wii U. GamesBeat's gallery details how the console's near field communication technology — essentially, objects communicating with each other just by touch — and a toy Rabbid changes Rayman's enemies into the cracked-out furballs. And if anything, you'll have a stylish tea coaster for wowing your date.
Bethesda forum member "Karellan" unearths potential downloadable content for The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim. Files from a folder called "DLC01" (included in the latest Skyrim patch) hint at the addition of Snow Elves — the ancient occupants of Skyrim — crossbows, and new vampire feeding animations. Just when I thought I was done, Skyrim's wily boomerang effect hits me once more. Time to get Snuggles, my vampire kitty archer, out of retirement.
Got any hot news tips? Send 'em over to [email protected].