Sometimes a trailer comes along that seizes the heart with emotional intensity while providing the viewer with fond, everlasting memories. This isn't that trailer.
Video Blips:
• Enlarging your Johnson is easier than ever thanks to Shadows of the Damned's myriad power-ups. My hopes of ordering this fine product fizzled when I realized my bank doesn't provide "MasturBate" cards. Foiled again!
Continue after the break for a basketball star's very persistent bid for a role in Rage, the macabre competition between two brothers in F.E.A.R. 3, and Dungeons & Dragons: Daggerdale's trove of weapons and abilities.
• Blake Griffin of the L.A. Clippers implores the creeped-out employees of id Software to include his imposing 6'10" figure and hoop skills in Rage. Yes, Griffin actually said "tiger jump," and yes, the game needs it now.
• How does the twisted Paxton Fettel and disturbingly silent Point Man keep things interesting in F.E.A.R. 3? Why, racking up the points by tearing apart enemies limb from limb, of course. Mom would be proud.
• Dungeons & Dragons: Daggerdale offers classic fantasy action and a sizable mountain of weapons and abilities. Thankfully, it's devoid of argumentative party members quarreling over how pointy Elvish ears should be.