Attention, Halo and Call of Duty fans: Drop your controllers and pay your respects to the game that started it all (at least in the first-person-shooter genre)—Wolfenstein 3D. Do you enjoy riddling bad guys with bullets? Mopping up Nazis? Splattering fellow Spartans with a Ghost in Halo 3? OK, so vehicles aren’t in Wolfenstein, but you wouldn’t be killing Nazis from a first-person perspective if it weren’t for id Software’s innovative Wolfenstein 3D.
This early FPS was released in 1992 for PCs. I didn’t own it until now, but I was fortunate enough to play it since it was on one of the few PCs in my elementary school’s computer lab. Wolfenstein is quite dated now, but the concept is classic and has spawned a long-lived series.
You explore Hitler’s lair as soldier B.J. Blazkowicz. You play in a first-person perspective, so you only see your character’s gun. Unlike modern FPS games, you don’t have access to a dozen weapons, large vehicles, and recharging shields. Instead, you get a paltry three guns that your grandma probably carries around. These include a pistol, an automatic, and a chain gun. Sorry, folks, it lacks rocket launchers, energy swords, or weapons that can launch nuclear warheads. But your three rudimentary weapons and your trusty knife will get the job done.
Despite having access to automatic weapons, you don’t want to go in guns-blazing. You aren’t Master Chief, so your energy doesn’t magically recharge. Instead, you rely on two videogame staples—meat and medpacks. You also have to constantly loot enemy corpses for ammo, but that’s standard FPS fare.
OK, so Wolfenstein’s standard-issue weaponry obviously won’t impress anyone, but how does the gameplay hold up? Well, it’s fairly archaic. Wolfenstein 3D consists of six episodes, each containing approximately 10 levels that nearly look identical. Each level’s layout isn’t an exact replica of the one that came before, but they could use a serious touchup from someone with an interior design degree. I have to cut this game some slack, since it was made in 1992, but the levels are so bland that you often can’t tell where you are. Each level contains identical-looking doors and drab blue walls (I wonder if the Happy Happy Cult from EarthBound was responsible for the paint job…), so it’s easy to get lost. Unfortunately, it doesn’t have a radar or map, so you need a good memory in order to keep track of the layout in each of Wolfenstein’s bland labyrinths. If you hate the color blue, you might want to stay away from this game, because you’ll be seeing that hue an awful lot.
In each level, you mow down hordes of enemies and find one or two keys before reaching an exit. The levels are huge and sometimes don’t have patterns or memorable landmarks, so you’re often forced to wander aimlessly in the hopes of finding a key. It’s important to keep track of where you’ve gone to the best of your ability, because you often need to backtrack in order to unlock previously inaccessible areas. You sometimes gain access hidden passages as well. These secrets can hide behind swastikas and portraits of Hitler, but they also lurk randomly behind walls. I highly recommend looking at a FAQ to avoid long periods of frustration. Thankfully, I was able to make it through most levels without much trouble, partly due to luck and also because I was sometimes able to recognize patterns.
Mazes and memorization are obviously an integral part of Wolfenstein’s gameplay, but is slaying Nazis fun? Hell, yes. Even though the gameplay’s fairly basic, it’s still fun to create a Nazi bloodbath. The enemies are as dumb as rocks—these 2D cardboard cutouts wander around aimlessly, occasionally nailing you with a deadly headshot. But you can usually take them out with ease if you aim from a distance. The types of enemies are fairly limited—you only find three ranks of Nazis, their dogs, and bosses, but taking Nazis out never seems to get tiresome. Occasionally, it can be frustrating when a pesky enemy shoots you from an unknown location and takes you out in one or two shots, but autosave is there for a reason.
The bosses are a bit more fun to fight than the soldiers and dogs. They’re not too difficult as long as you have the chain gun, plenty of ammo, and hide behind walls, but they sure look cool. Fighting Hitler is Wolfenstein’s most memorable encounter. Battling Mecha Hitler and then watching him die in slow-mo is a great moment that should have been a part of history. You also fight army generals, scientists, and even a giantess (who’s the only female in the game). Most of these bosses can be taken out with ease (at least on the lower difficulty levels), but they’re a satisfying conclusion to each of Wolfenstein’s episodes.
Besides the memorable bosses, part of the Wolfenstein’s fun comes from the game’s oodles of secrets. Each level contains numerous hidden passages and treasures that’ll give you points (yes, points, like those you’d find in a game like Pac-Man). It’s fun trying to get as high a score as possible while meeting each level’s par time. Some of the par times are nearly impossible to get on your first playthrough thanks to Wolfenstein’s often convoluted level design, but it’s still fun to try.
Wolfenstein 3D was certainly a groundbreaking game upon its initial release, but it now feels fairly dated. Most gamers will likely have had enough of the game after the first few levels. Some levels are too convoluted to enjoy, and there aren’t enough weapons and enemies to satisfy your average hippie. The controls are also fairly basic in that you can’t aim vertically, jump, or turn quickly. Thankfully, Wolfenstein 3D is only $5, so that’s not asking too much from players who enjoyed the game back in the day, but gamers who missed this classic probably won’t want to look back; it just hasn’t aged as gracefully as retro games from most other genres. If you’re feeling nostalgic, hit the download button; otherwise, you’d be better off gaining ranks in Call of Duty or tea-bagging opponents in Halo 3.
Score: 6.0
Pros:
- It’s a perfect port of the original FPS.
- You get to duke it out with Hitler.
- The chain gun is fun.
- It’s got plenty of missions.
Cons:
- The gameplay’s boring by today’s standards.
- You can’t aim vertically.
- The enemy A.I. is terrible.
- There’s no multiplayer.
- No gameplay or visual enhancements have been made over the original.
- It lacks enemy and weapon variety.
- Wandering through mazes is frustrating.
- Its soundtrack is subpar.